Start Dating with no career

Dating with no career

Spare your loved ones the grief of wondering how it will be divided among them. Then your journey across a sea of hurtful words begins.

Unfashionable as it may be, I’m going to go ahead and say that, in 2013, men need to stop dating losers. When women deride a man as being a “useless loser,” what they really seem to be complaining about is someone who blindly, uncompromisingly places his own prerogatives above all else, often at the expense of others.

The girl with the loser boyfriend who won’t get a job because it would “cut into practice time with the band” is actually saying that if he would compromise a little, they could probably realize some goals that would benefit them both equally. While career/ambition is far from the only way in which being a loser can manifest itself, it’s definitely common, and prominent.

Men are expected to have a sense of direction and ambition more or less from birth, so much so that most women will list “ambition” right under “sense of humor” on a list of vague qualities they seek out in a romantic partner.

It says something about society as a whole, in that men have never really valued drive and success as selection criteria and we’re all kind of OK with that.

The gist of it was that 30 is not the new 20, and that grown women really ought to be getting their sh*t together in their 20s. Don’t refuse to get a full-time job as an excuse to figure out who you are. She’s such a loser.” The more I think about why, the more depressing the can of worms becomes (and a can full of worms should be depressing enough on its own).

No, the last part, the thing about dating “losers.” It’s a testament to just how useless TED talks are, because people have been telling women that their boyfriends are losers forever.

Any woman now in her 20s and 30s was likely raised to believe that she can (and should) do well in school, get education, and then go forth into the world and make her mark.